2010/12/30

Happy New Year

祝大家新的一年多彩多姿!

2010/12/23

Another year

我們上週去國家劇院看英國劇場導演詮釋日本文學作品改編成「春琴」,表演結束後再度到貴婦百貨公司看看今年聖誕樹長什麼樣。總之,一年過去了,我又多長了一歲,想到自己還保有一頭黑髮,可以令忙碌的店老板誤認為是「妹妹」,就覺得今年過得不算太差。

佳節愉快!放假期間有太多書和電影要看,部落格會暫時放手。唉,掙扎要不要先小小地看完Black Swan,它太值得在大銀幕上觀賞了。不過,我覺得之前宣傳一時的女女情戲和女女無關,亦和情無關。

2010/12/20

Rocking Chair or Rock'n Roll

幾個月前,Fruit很高興地告訴我要送個聖誕節禮物:張清芳的演唱會,而且是搖滾特區的座位.那時我心裡暗想,我從來就不曾是她的粉絲,這根本是她自己的聖誕節禮物吧!

她為了培養我的參與感,開始在車上播放張清芳的原版CD.老實說,我沒有很投入.我是一個很不在地生活的人,一直不熱衷KTV娛樂.雖然知道她的歌曲,但談不上熟悉.我一直很擔心坐在搖滾特區當呆子怎麼辦?

KTV娛樂有種特殊文化,關於失戀、暗戀、苦戀的歌曲最能引人注意.我不擅於將情感投射於歌唱(但跳舞是例外),去KTV對我是件苦差事.當同事們對著螢幕忘情高歌,我則處於黑暗疏離之中,感覺份外孤獨.後來同事了解,不必找我當痛苦的分母.

2010/12/18

Will a woman steal matching top just for the car?

據說義大利電視台禁播這則汽車廣告:一位黑衣棕髮女性駕駛淡蓮藕色雷諾車參加派對,席間對另一女子目不轉睛。對方以為來電,兩人躲進房間意圖進一步。沒想到棕髮女子只是使計偷走對方上衣,好匹配她的愛車顏色。

這則廣告目標對象不是同志市場,連女性市場...都有點說不過去。



我想起早期「意識型態」廣告公司為中興百貨製作的廣告名句:「女性主義,就是敗在愛情和衣服上。」這是商人的藉口,為女性購物衝動找台階,但至少還有一定的格調。不過近年來將衣服狂熱,從買衍伸到偷,令我有點忐忑不安。

之前這部廣告採用同樣手法,飯店女服務生看到女客人的衣服就完全棄守「職業道德」。我不太喜歡這種感覺,把女女情慾和有錢階級女性結合在一起。偷衣的女人是有法律和道德上的瑕疵,她們對有錢的同女下手,並不能因此減損她們的責任。

而且這兩部都使用蒙眼的手法,好像有點把SM作負面性的暗示。

2010/12/16

Jodie Foster: What I've Learned

原圖文出處:Jodie Foster: What I've Learned,以下為重點節譯。


Fears. Some of them are wounds that exist long before we exist.
(有些恐懼造成的創傷早有悠久歷史.)

My mom was always late. It drove me crazy as a child. So I'm always on time-or early.
(她有時間潔癖,不喜歡遲到.)

There's a tremendous amount of power that comes from not having to say yes.
(不隨意苟同,就是種力量.你得佩服她的堅持.)

It's very hard for me to get a new car. It's really hard for me to get a new house. It's really hard for me to move on from the things that give me stability. I just ... don't. There's a tenacity to that which is great, because I'm totally loyal. But that keeps you living in the past a bit. And it's hard to embrace the future if you are continually holding on to who you used to be.
(她念舊、穩定、忠誠,但也坦承很難擁抱未來)

2010/12/14

The Good Wife's les plot

艾日提到這部影集,我索性搜尋YouTube找到Lili Taylor的演出:



戲中角色Kalinda Shemar的女女暗示非常明顯,這則影片就顯示她和Lana有「一腿」嗎?

Alternative Poster

從另一位Twitter網友站上看到插畫家Akiko Stehrenberger為不同電影海報重新設計。我特別挑了兩部拉子相關的影片海報。對一般觀眾而言,促銷感或許不足,但是別有一番設計風味,而且還待別點題。

2010/12/04

The Beaver Trailer


請放下對梅伯的個人成見,有機會好好地看看茱蒂的導演功力到底如何.(天呀,我真的很懷念她的作品.)

2010/11/29

Gigola

法國新片《Gigola》目前正在各影展出現,台灣已有片商代理,中文譯名暫定為:《巴黎舞男》。用「舞男」可能引起混淆,因為主角是生理女性的Tomboy。且看片商提供的中文介紹:

「備受文壇爭議驚世駭俗的敗德小說改編。

不用給我愛,我只需要錢~

她是女孩,但她的心裡住了一個不折不扣的男人。到了晚上,她總是穿上那件筆挺的燕尾服,周旋在上流社會多金貴婦人與妓女之間,為她們提供性服務,金錢與酒精對她而言就像流水,她耽溺其中,無止盡地揮霍。從來不知道羞恥是什麼,而這也是她最迷人的地方…」

2010/11/24

Lip Service Mumbles

(2012/6/1更新:第二季心得報告


從The L Word之後,以拉子為劇情主線,曾在電視上常態播映的影集(排除單元劇、迷你影集、網路影集),知名的有英國《Sugar Rush》 (1~2季)、美國《South of Nowhere》(1~2 3季)、《Exes & Ohs》(1~2季),以及英國剛結束第1季的《Lip Service》,除了TLW突破三季魔咒,以拉子為劇情主線的影集,真能在電視圈佔有一席地位?

2010/11/23

Lena Headey in Game Of Thrones

Lena Headey最新作品是由HBO製作的奇幻影集:Game Of Thrones(小說 A Song of Ice and Fire的第一部曲),預定明年播出,大家很快就能看到她重新出現在螢幕上。

她飾演女王Cersei Lannister,真不敢相信她明明還年輕,演母親的機率卻愈來愈多了。不過,看看下面這段預告,她走路的方式還不夠威嚴。


2010/11/21

The Night Watch filming in Bath

The Night Watch由BBC2改編,正在Bath(巴斯)拍攝,取景地點包括 Sydney Gardens,Royal Victoria Park。預定明年播出。

製作人為Annie Tricklebank,她最近製作Lark Rise to Candleford,影集的女主角是演過Sugar Rush的Olivia Hallinan。不過,OH並沒有出現在The Night Watch,反而是在Sugar Rush第二季一開始喜歡幼齒妹的Anna在本劇中出現。

目前己知演員名單如下:(2010/11/26更新)

2010/11/18

Seize the moment

意外

前一陣子,有件事搞得我心神不寧。

我服務的事業處在年中調整了組織,原先同一部門的苦命成員,化整為零分散到其他單位,因此和舊成員聯繫機會就變少了.有天我聽說原部門一位年輕女同事因為乳癌開刀.這把我嚇了一大跳,她比我年輕了6~8歲,而且她已是第二次動刀.所幸,病情是初期,而且開刀規模也較小。

三年來,這是我們事業處第四個案例,而且一次比一次年輕.第二個案例已經因病過世,乳癌的危險性真的不可輕忽。

從病人的共通點來看,我們的職務經常承受壓力,性格偏向認真、努力、有責任感.我們的情緒是比較容易激動,但來得快,去得快.....電視廣告詞該重新檢討了。看來,認真的女人不是最美,而是很容易得病。

我現在會多多提醒三十出頭的女性,一定要定期檢查,因為癌症發生年紀往下降,發生率越來越誇張,眼睜睜地見它四處肆虐。你越怕檢查,就越容易出狀況。時間越晚,機會就越難站在你身邊。

除了健康檢查,別忘記要有完備的保險。只要先有心理準備,人就會踏實。就算發生狀況,不會先把自己嚇死。更別忘記,周遭的人會比你還恐慌,所以要先顧好自己,才有餘力應付別人。

影展

我看了幾部今年金馬獎影展的影片。

很久沒有趕影展,這種日子很生疏。我記得一開始要買套票,Fruit有心理障礙。她說兩年前我買完金馬影展的電影票就去開刀了,她不喜歡兩件事情的連結。我在想,如果我開完兩次刀還不能夠高高興興地去看影展,這樣的人生太沒意思了。

還是買了一組套票,只是第一天劃位讓人火冒三丈。

今年是首次在7-11連鎖超商機台劃位。我以前沒使用過,不熟悉操作方式。劃位首日當然是先挑選熱門影片,我按著螢幕上的座位表,卻沒有一絲反應。店員根本沒來瞧一眼,直接告訴我們當機。這理由聽起來很正常啊,所以我們就晚一點換另外一家執行。

大半天過去了,一連換了五家,我很想把機器打爛。沒想到旁邊有位牽著二條小狗的輕淑女自告奮勇要幫我操作。起初她說她稍早劃位成功,但她操作機台依舊沒有反應,她便拿出手機直撥到金馬影展工作中心。我才知道她是工作成員,有一票人還在辦公室坐鎮指揮。

不過,那通電話真是白打了。她說只有我出問題,其他人都沒有問題。他們只是記下我的劃位號碼,要我明天再試一次。

明天再試還是不成功。我想這可能是一個詛咒,老天根本不想讓我看影展。是不是該拿去退錢?

過了幾天,心想過了尖鋒時刻,應該剩下不那麼熱門的影片,總可以選擇吧。我決定再試一次。

這時我才注意到,原來是白色的座位才能選擇,紅色的座位表示已劃位。真是心酸啊,當初我在小螢幕上拉來拉去全部都是紅色座位,根本看不出有什麼白色座位可選?

收拾起心情,再加上幸運等到加場演出,終於選出幾部:
  • Smash His Camera 狗仔教主
  • 短片集錦:怪咖俱樂部
  • Vincere 墨索里尼的秘密戀人
  • Tokyo Godfathers 東京教父
  • The Strange Case of Angelica 安潔莉卡的奇幻旅程
  • The Red Shoes 紅菱艷
  • Paprika 盜夢偵探

花博

如果不想走馬看花,最好能去個兩三次才有時間消化吸收.

前天我休假去醫院定期回診,決定回程去花博逛逛.下午2:30入園,晚上9:30離開.幸好是週間,而且天氣微涼,偶而飄著毛毛雨,遊客不多,許多館區不必排隊就能直接入場,但是大熱門的「夢想館」是例外,根本不能肖想.

即使沒有人潮壓力,我的力氣只能逛完三分之一.星光票是個不錯的選擇,夜間雖然視線有限,但對館內展覽沒有影響,而且夜景還算頗有情調.然而在風大的大佳園區,夜間就不是個好時段,西口部份甚至有荒涼感,遙遠的東口有燈光閃耀,但我沒有進一步探路.

幾個主題建築非常吸睛,但是展覽的軟體,少部份水準不齊,還有改善空間.飲食區反而令我訝異,大多是有點名號的廠商入駐,像是自成一個餐飲展.

我不太喜歡目前推出的紀念品,大多過於俗麗可愛.不過,「天使生活館」的紀念品則特立獨行.基本上,這個館的主題在花博中有點抽象.其實我希望它能維持一貫格調,而不是在影片中突然插入一段動畫貓咪跳花博舞,可惜了.

「舞蛹館」安排屏風表演班的劇碼,改編自魯凱族故事的「百合戀」(不是你想的「百合」).故事雖然有點父權,但是舞台效果和音樂比我預期地傑出.想想表現台灣地方特色時,常回頭找尋原住民的傳統.這是個好事,但是在現實生活,不同世代的新舊移民還在想辦法共處,自大與排斥是個需要不斷修煉的人性課題.

園區之間的低底盤接駁公車真是文明的象徵.我看見老先生推著輪椅上的老太太遊園,公車服務人員協助架上一個小斜板,他們就能輕鬆上下車.我想到捷運站常有志工帶領著視障者轉站換車.當我們能夠體貼到少數族群的需求,就表示社會是往進步的方向而行.

難得台北舉辦如此大型的活動,雖然稱不上偉大,還算井然有序,值得一遊.希望我們因此可以改善景觀審美能力,把自家建築亂種一通的盆栽和隨便牽扯的電線、冷氣管,以及廢棄的招牌好好整理一番,或許就是這場活動的最大意義.

2010/11/16

Lip Service 106

窗子與格子

最後一集為了趕快為每個人的故事有個暫時的結尾,劇本結構和節奏令我發狂到最高點....不過,我還是想把重點只放在視覺上。這一集沒有太多顏色遊戲,但有些形式不斷出現。

2010/11/10

Villa Amalia


同樣為了擺脫一段不如意的愛情關係而遠赴意大利找尋自我,美國影片與法國影片採取截然不同的態度。《Under The Tuscn Sun 托斯卡尼艷陽》下循溫情圓滿路線,主角和美麗的房子成為世界的中心,讓觀眾跟著劇中人獲得滿足(雖然這不是什麼壞事)。《Villa Amalia女人出走》則是獨斷地自我主義,她要與現代社會完全脫勾,孤獨地住在懸崖邊簡陋的房子。

2010/11/09

Lip Service 105


如果硬要選出6集之中,劇本最好的一集,我會選擇第五集。這一集的重點是眾人計劃為Tess舉辦生日驚喜派對。為了達到「驚喜」的效果,他們故意欺騙壽星沒空為她慶生。不料,眾人互相的謊言,全部在派對上爆開來。

2010/11/04

I Think You Like History

本站Room In Rome相關文章

《Room In Rome》出現許多歷史線索,到底這些安排有沒有特別意義?我們可能永遠不會知道導演真正的意圖,我只是整理出一些歷史背景,讓《Room In Rome》從另外一個角度增添不少層次感。這些背景對劇情不致於有決定性的影響,但可增加觀影的樂趣,你定會訝異歐洲文化的重要片段被濃縮在一個房間,一個夜晚。

2010/11/02

Lip Service 104


這一集讓我懷疑是不是誤會幕後製作人員的「花心」,其實他們最喜歡採用黑色?

2010/10/30

Sing along

所有《Room In Rome》相關文章

感謝Dawn的協助,找到《Room In Rome》最早第一版預告片後半段使用的電吉他配樂,在正式影片中則出現在兩人第二次激情之前,Natasha跟著電視MV所唱的俄文流行樂。

MV比歌詞有意思多了,有輛高速行駛的加長型結婚禮車(這車子比邱比特的箭更為盲目可怕),不小心撞上路旁的女歌手,隨身家當散落地上。她變身為車頭的新娘裝飾玩偶。1:28時車子撞上另一個男子,MV開始出現另一對男女相吻,結婚吃蛋糕,緊接著女歌手尖叫(就是影片中Natasha歌唱最後尖叫的那一段)沒多久,車頭的新娘玩偶跌落到地上,女歌手轉換為常人,把新娘玩偶撿起,放入皮箱中。

歌詞內容透露的訊息反而不多,多在描述心境,但是有一句提到男友移情別戀。或許這可以預告或影射Natasha對未婚夫的看法,畢竟按照電影的流程,這一段還沒有提到她的未婚夫,第二次激情後才出現未婚夫,第三次激情後才說出未婚夫與姊姊的秘密戀情。

(*我又胡思亂想了。女歌手樸素樣有一點神似Ellen Page,歌詞還出現那麼多“拉”)

電影是個分工複雜的工業,既使是個簡單的配樂,「或許」幕後工作人員有他如此安排的理由。



(俄文歌詞以google translate譯成英文如下)

2010/10/26

Lip Service 103


可能美術指導突然想起還沒用過黑色,這一集黑色物件大增.黑色最好的搭擋是白色,跟著出現多幕黑白配的情況.

2010/10/25

Fruit's love messages

生命既堅強又脆弱,有時只能盡人事聽天命。我喜歡收抬記憶,整理歷史,好像回首來時路,能多些撫慰。

最近突發奇想,把手機裡的簡訊備份出來。第一次那麼完整地看過Fruit發來的簡訊,好像我們的生活大事記,真後悔以前刪掉太多。那是她的心情寫照,「家事如麻」的生活。相較於我在版上刻意保持理智冷靜,她則完全情感奔放,還順便透露我的真實缺點。

2010/10/21

It Gets Better Project

這個同志公益活動很有創意:It Gets Better Project。為了防止青少年同志自殺,他們想讓年輕人看到希望,覺得自己並不孤獨,能夠有更大的勇氣生存下去。其實,這就是同志可見度(visibility)的重要性。與其寄望八卦媒體被扭曲的同志報導,還不如發揮web 2.0的精神,讓大家用視頻現身說法。

在這個活動中,活動影像真的比平面文字或圖片來得效果強烈。他們就是活生生的人,南腔北調,三教九流,讓It Gets Better看起來更具體,而不是一句口號。許多真情表白都值得細細觀看,我隨意挑了兩組人馬,只是想讓大家看看,她們真的好有「夫妻臉」。

2010/10/19

Lip Service 102

寢具也是場景設計的重要項目.這一集出現四個臥室畫面,首先出場的是Lou的房間.整套寢具,包含旁邊的窗簾都是冷調的深藍色,偏向男性品味,不太像是Lou會採用的色系.或許暗示這個臥室是另一個男性的意志,因為Lou後來被爆料與有婦之夫曖昧關係.
請注意上方床板右邊有條紅色直紋,床左方地上擺了一個紅色方枕,上面有一條藍色直紋.

2010/10/12

Lip Service 101

大部份的顏色應該並沒有特別的意義,以下挑選出來的畫面,雖然歸納出主題,但只是出於巧合和一點有趣的觀察。

2010/10/06

Naked Truth of Room In Rome

(最近更新:2010/11/6 )

麥登曾說《Room In Rome》是他拍過「最簡單」的影片.電影的形式上確實非常單純:單一線性時間軸,有限的人物和空間.....沒想到他在最壓縮的條件下,大量採用象徵的技巧,有幾個突破時空的巧思,提供故事景深,讓電影極富後韻.

2010/10/01

Elaine Cassidy Photo Archive


可能很多人知道這個網站了:Elaine Cassidy Photo Archive,我在裡頭看到她們「母女」合照,好懷念Fingersmith的美好時光!Elaine Cassidy看起來依然年輕,好像時光從沒流動啊。

doubanclaim4ec66456016635da

2010/09/29

Looking Back

我常要求Fruit多陪我出去走走,不管到那裡都好,有時得軟硬兼施,又哄又騙。我隨手看了一下這兩年的照片,一起經歷了一些奇奇怪怪的活動。


再次證明不要相信商人的廣告詞。看別人在舞台上奔跑或許很新鮮,但真的不值得那個票價。要真當作派對來放肆,旁邊一大堆觀眾是當不了盡興的賓客。我努力保持年輕的心境,回頭看見Fruit一臉于我何干。


2010/09/25

The Roads to Room in Rome

本站Room In Rome相關文章

現在還不到分析《Room in Rome》的時候,但這真是一部很有意思的影片(即使在聽不懂西語發音,沒有字幕的階段下).我心中已準備了好幾條解析的線索,其中一條與地理和空間有關.

義大利自古以來就是情慾與浪漫的代名詞,在西方同志文化中亦佔有重要的地位.Anne Lister在日記中用Go to Italy暗示要求完整的女女性行為,Daphne Du Maurier(戴芬杜莫里哀):"I had Venetian tendencies. 我有威尼斯式的傾向.",指的就是女女傾向(見本篇:神秘的作品與作家的秘密).這部電影故事發生在羅馬,吻合基本的文化傳承. 

我很好奇Alba在片中攤開一張立體繪法的復古地圖,好像在描述這間旅館的前世今生.她牽引著Natasha的手指,會合在一處半圓形的劇場(?),接著兩人環顧房間似發思古之幽情.沒多久,Natasha的心理完全放開,主動親吻了Alba,主動褪去衣衫,主動坐上床....才有了第一次的激情(那時接近半夜三點整).到底Alba指的是什麼地點?

2010/09/22

"Thank" You Very Much


中秋節一起來高歌這首曲子,保證神清氣爽:可以合理地使用髒話!

我常在Fruit開車時撥放Lily Allen的專輯,最喜歡她這首歌“Fxxk You“。所選的YouTube視頻已經配上中文字幕,英文原文如下:

2010/09/20

Can you see it ?

請大陸地區的網友特別注意:Orange's Review現在有了新的網域名:http://www.orange-review.com/,大陸地區的網友可以試試用這個方式直接瀏覽,至於原本不受封網影響的網友,原來的聯結 http://orange-review.blogspot.com/ 仍然有效。

我不敢保證一定能暢行無阻,但是根據對面回饋的結果,目前似乎能直接看到九成左右的內容.請大家將看到的情況,出現那些問題,留言給我,或是email:orange169369@gmail.com .方便的話,可以將畫面擷圖一起寄給我.

謝謝大家的幫忙,提供我許多寶貴的意見。其實我的本意是要解決因為封網,不能直接瀏覽的問題(這不是待客之道啊),我自作主張想了一些奇怪的解決方式,什麼搬家,分站之類的。聽大家講搬站的大工程,真是手腳無力,想乾脆攤倒在地上算了.還好IV幫我釐清問題,分析不同的解決方案(我感動到很想掉眼淚--科技怎麼如此難弄)。最後以我粗淺的程度,先不搬家,選擇反代理的方式(意思好像是以前你們個別用代理翻牆過來,換成由我翻牆過去).

這兩天台灣有颱風,外面風強雨大,我正在家弄得焦頭爛額.但根據IV的指導,我完成了三件大事:
    1)買了獨立的網域名稱,取代原來blogspot.com結構的URL (Blogger好方便,在自家設定的頁面就可以直接用google checkout向合作廠商購買網域名稱,不必先另外向廠商購買)
    2)再到http://www.you8g.com/ 完成登記 (感覺名額有限,好像額滿就不能處理反代理)
    3)最困難的一步,就是回到賣網域名稱的網站管理介面,改設CNAME (我完全不知道那是什麼)

哇,不曉得這樣可以維持多久?希望能幫助大部份有需要的讀者.

2010/09/19

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 8

Behind The Door

Anne Lister與巴夫人在房裡的時間越來越久,要說她們的行為沒被別人發覺異樣,我是打死不相信。Anne已經不再滿足於牽牽小手,親親小臉的層級,她要求更直接的肌膚之親。但倆人對於雙方的關係有不同的期望。巴夫人要求正式名份,雖然她不見得能清楚描述那到底是什麼樣的同性婚姻。畢竟觀念太先進了。Anne其實只想要一個情婦,而且是短暫的激情。可憐的巴夫人頻頻招架不住。不過話說回來,她並非不愛這個味。
    1824/11/11:I locked the door as usual, then lifted her down and place her on my knee. By & by she said, 's the door fast?' I, forgetting, got up to see, then took her again on my knee & there she sat till four & three quarters, when Mlld de Sans sent to ask if I could receive. [I] told the maid I was sorry, I could not, I had got so bad a headache. The fact was I was heated & in a state not fit to see anyone. 她關上門,將巴夫人拉到膝上.巴夫人擔心門沒關緊,她還起身檢查一次.倆人這樣親密挨著大半個下午.連珊小姐差人問訪,她都推說頭痛不能見客.實際上她正在熱頭上,怎能見人?
    I had kissed & pressed Mrs Barlow on my knee till I had had a complete fit of passion. My knees & thighs shook, my breathing & everything told her what was the matter. She said she did me no good. I said it was a little headache & I should go to sleep. 她身軀抽動,呼吸急促,巴夫人當然了解人事,卻半開玩笑,這樣有害健康.Anne順勢說是頭痛,睡一覺就好了.
    I then leaned on her bosom &, pretending to sleep, kept pottering about & rubbing the surface of her queer. Then made several gentle efforts to put my hand up her petticoats which, however, she prevented. But she so crossed her legs & leaned against me that I put my hand over & grubbled her on the outside of her petticoats till she was evidently a little excited, & it was from this that Mlld de Sans' maid roused us.她靠在巴夫人胸口裝睡,但手不安份地伸向禁地.巴夫人併攏雙腿努力阻擋,她只好在襯裙外徘徊.巴夫人被勾起幾分興奮,此時正是珊小姐差人在門外問訪.
*研究指出此處的queer,推論是Anne誤植,本意應該是指quim,即女性私處。
    Mrs Barlow had once whispered, holding her head on my shoulder, a word or two which, I think, were, 'Do you love me?' But I took no notice, still pretending to be asleep. She afterwards said once or twice, 'It is good to pretend to be asleep,' & the once, while I was grubbling pretty strongly, 'You know you pinch me.' From this she never attempted to escape. 巴夫人倚在她的肩頭,低語問道「最可怕的」問題:「你是否愛我?」她繼續裝睡不回答,努力進攻.巴夫人一會兒抱怨她裝睡,一會兒嬌斥:妳在捏我啊.
    Before, when rubbing her in front, she had every now & then held my hand but always let me have it back again. After Mlld de Sans' maid roused us, she [drew] her chair close to the bed. I sat on the bed & partly knelt on one knee so as to have her quite close & she began to reproach herself, saying she was a poor, weak creature & what should I think of her.巴夫人天人交戰,幾次拉走她的手,最後又讓她放回來.珊小姐的僕人離去後,巴夫人把椅子拉近床邊.她則坐在床上單腳微曲,靠近巴夫人.巴夫人開始自責自己怯於面對誘惑.
    I protested love & respect. Said it was all my fault & I would be miserable if she waw too severe to herself. Can you not love me on little bit for all the great deal I love you? 她雖然承認錯在自己,但不忘抱怨巴夫人怎能為了保全清譽,而陷她於痛苦之中.為何巴夫人不施予小愛回報她的大愛?
巴夫人面對下午激烈攻防,精力盡失.晚上照例和她相對,但面容憔悴,而且顯露愧色.

她提到晚餐時向別人讚美巴夫人的外貌,對方回予完全相反意見:
    [On my] saying to Mme Galvani that she was pretty, 'No, not at all, said she, 'beaucoup plus laide que moi' ['uglier than me'], & that she look eight & thirty. Her skin & complexion were bad. I thought of all this when kissing her & thought it would not do for always. 她說巴夫人很漂亮,賈夫人卻批評「比我還醜」,說巴夫人看來像38歲,膚質很差.她親吻著巴夫人就想起這段話.這是感嘆好花不常在嗎?
巴夫人自己也感受到年齡的障礙.
    11/12:She said she wondered how I could like an old woman as she was. I said if she really thought this, I ony hoped it was an argument in favour of what I had just said about my regard. 巴夫人很疑惑為什麼她會喜歡上像她這樣年紀的女人?
    In stooping over her, the waist of my new gown hung off a little. She put her hand down on the left side, almost touchin the nipple of the breast, evidently wishing to feel it. She felt the stuffing but made no remark. I let her do it, observing I should hope to do the same. She did not much notice this but with a half no. She said it looked as if ready for anyone. I said for no one but herself, but she might do anything.她起身作勢制止巴夫人胡思亂想,剛好衣服腰際被扯緊,胸部線條顯露.巴夫人垂手幾乎碰觸她的粉暈.巴夫人感觸到她的挺起,沒有顯示任何表情.她也想對巴夫人回手,對方不置可否.巴夫人說她似乎蓄勢待發,她奉承只等巴夫人一人.
    She begins to stand closer to me. I might easily press queer to queer. Our liking each other is now mutually understood and acknowledged. I asked her this morning how much she thought I liked her. She said as much as contented her & that was not a little. She would not refuse sleping with me if we could manage it well....巴夫人越靠越近,她順勢貼攏,倆人至此心意已明.她開始提出同床的要求.....
次日,Anne放下純潔無知的偽裝,開始講起追尋自我的心路歷程.
    11/13:[I] said I had thought much, studied anatomy, etc. Could not find it out. Could not understand myself. It was all the effect of the mind. Noexterior formation accounted for it. Alluded to their begin an internal correspondence or likenes of some of the male or female organs of generation. Alluded to the stones not slipping thro' the ring till after birth, etc. She took all this very well, I said ladies could often hear from a man what they could not from a woman & she could from me what she could not from Mrs Mackenzie. She allowed this, saying it depended on how she loved them. 她思考了很久,還研究過解剖,根本找不到答案,不曉得自已為何和別人不一樣.她歸因於心理因素.可能性別在形成時,沒有區分出來.或許出生時,天命沒有配對好,就好像birth stone沒有對到正確的birth ring.常聽有些男仕提過,他們無法從女人身上得到滿足.她進一步說,巴夫人可以從她得到的滿足,卻不一定能從麥小姐得到.巴小姐認為這要依據她有多愛那一個人.
    Got on the subject of Saffic regard. [I] said there was artifice in it. It was very different from mine & would be no pleasure to me. I liked to have those i loved near me as possible, etc. Asked if she understood. She said no. [I] told her I knew by her eyes she did & she did not deny it, therefore I know she understands all about the use of a----. Alluded to self-pollution, how much it was practised. Thought my connection with the ladies more excusable than this. 她接著提到女性之愛(不知她對於saffic的定義為何?),認為過於「人工化」(暗指假陽具),不符她的喜好.她喜歡儘量和對方親近.她問巴夫人是否了解她所指為何.巴夫人否認,但是她從對方眼神看出,巴夫人完全曉得假陽具的使用.
    Happening to say I often told my uncle & aunt how I longed to have someone with me, she wondered what they would think of the person. I said my aunt knew nothing about it, nor would my uncle think anything. Then, expressing my wish to have her, she anwered, 'But we have had not priest but love. Do you not know the quotation?' I did not yet I said yes. 她常對姑丈和姑媽表示要找個女伴,兩位老人家並不反對,但對女女一事完全不懂.她便向巴夫人提議,巴夫人卻反應:「我們的結合,只有愛情而沒有神父的見證.妳聽過這句俗諺?」她根本沒聽過,卻硬是點頭.(*Not priest but love,後來便成為Anne其中一本日記集的書名)
    She told me before dinner I had given her a warm look the first morning she had come to call on me & she had remembered it ever since & always liked me. 原來巴夫人對她一見鍾情.她到達巴黎次日早餐,對巴夫人投以溫暖的眼神,從此喜歡上她. 
    11/14:[I] became rather excited. Felt her breasts & queer a little. Tried to put my hand up her petticoat but she prevented. Touched her flesh just above the knee twice. I kissed her warmly & held her strongly. She said what a state I was putting myself into. She got up to go away & went to the door. I followed. 她繼續貼身進取的攻勢,巴夫人繼續阻止她的手在襯裙裡亂竄.最後巴夫人脫身退至門邊.她趕緊尾隨.
這段可以證明,巴夫人同並非不愛這個味。
    Finding she lingered a moment, pressed her closely & again tried to put my hand up her petticoats. Finding that she would not let me do this but still that she was a little excited, I became regularly so myself. I felt her grow warm & she let me grubble & press her tightly with my left hand whilst I held her against the door with the other, all the while putting my tongue into her mouth & kissing her so passionately as to excite her not a little, I am sure. 其實巴夫人在門邊另闢戰場.兩人站著妳來我往,情緒越來越高昂,乾脆法式熱吻起來.
    When it was over she put her handkerchief to her eyes &, shedding a few tears, said, 'You are used to these things, I am not.' 終於冷卻下來,巴夫人懊惱輕拭清淚,怪罪她之前裝清純:「妳根本就是箇中好手,但我不是」(怎麼把錯全推到對方身上)
    I still therefore pressed her to let me in tomorrow before she was up, when Mrs Page [Mrs Barlow's servant] was gone with Miss Barlow to school. She would not promise. Asked me what I would do. I said teach her to love me better.....On leaving me, her face looked hot, her hair out of curl & herself languid, exactly as if after a connection had taken place....她仍在說服同床,提議巴夫人的僕人送小孩上學時,讓她溜進房裡.巴夫人一口回拒,又好奇她想做什麼?她說要教導她更好的技巧....巴夫人要離去時,她臉頰發燙,頭髮散亂,全身酸軟,好似真的經歷一場性事....
*我猜想Anne腦子裡想的是這樣的畫面:
    11/15:I contrived to ask if I had no hope of making her dearer to me before I went. She said, 'No, never, till we are married.' 'Oh,' said I, 'can nothing persuade you to anticipate?' 'No,' said she, 'I hope not. You would then leave me very unhappy.' 她不斷要求在她離開巴黎之前能更進一步.巴夫人堅持一定要在結婚之後.
    I told her how she had changed me. I used to think I could not choose a woman who had had any experience & at first I could not bear to hear her name Colonel Barlow. Now I rather liked both these things. 她吐露一件心事.她以前認為不可能愛上曾有異性經驗的女人,更不敢想像她還掛著夫家的姓氏.現在她對這兩件事亳不在意.(Anne從這段感情獲得很大的自信,卻沒學會如個珍惜對方)
Anne的最大罩門在於她不知如何穿著體面。
    11/17:She said the people stopt to stare at me. She thought it was my gown, it was so trumbled & shabby. 巴夫人說街上行人會駐足注視著她,因為她的衣著實在寒酸.
拜倫的作品一直是Anne追求女友的暗號。
    11/18: I foolishly told her I meant to give her Lord Byron's works, She mentioned Galignani's edition, which I knew not of, & I must give it. 她開玩笑要送巴夫人一本拜倫的作品,巴夫人指名要Galignani的版本.她沒聽過,硬是點頭要送.
後來,她們真的同床了﹣﹣不過是同床午睡。
    11/22:At twelve, got into bed with my flannel waistcoat, chemise, drawers, nigh-things, dressing-gown, stockings & boots on. At first, Mrs Barlow, who never left me till five, sat by my bedside. I then persuaded her to et in. I got my left leg & thigh quite between hers. Held her close. I think we both slept for a considerable while. 不知為何她正中午全身穿載齊全睡在床上。大概穿這麼多,沒有其他意圖的樣子,巴夫人跟著一起睡了午覺。
    [I] said again & again I wished I could marry her. I would gladly do it at that moment, then I could have my own way. 她一而再表示要與巴夫人成婚.但一轉頭,她心知肚明不過是場面話,只為能為所欲為.
    11/23:Poor soul! I begin to feel that I have really attached her & that I cannot find it in my heart to deceive her more. 她一時良心發現,覺得自己越來越喜歡巴夫人,不忍心欺騙對方.
    Poor soul! How she is deceived. Why have I done this? I thought at first to succeed on my own terms, letting her know I was engaged. Then I could not acknowledge that Marianna loved me. I durst not say I was engaged to anyone else lest she should hereafter see me living with Marianna. For Marianna's sake I could not let her suspect anything & thus have I gone, from little to more, into this deceiving. 她承認讓巴夫人知道自己有婚約約是權益之計,但後來不敢明說那就是Marianna.將來巴夫人看到她和Marianna一起生活不就拆穿了?為了Marianna,她的謊言越扯越大.

2010/09/18

Any Suggestions?

由於大陸封網短時間難解,顧慮他們翻牆過來非常辛苦,長期來看,轉載並不是最好的方法。我正在考慮是不是要到大陸地區可以聯結得到的網站開分版?還是有所謂mirror site的方可以解決?可不可以有高人指點迷津?

2010/09/16

Queer Women in classical art :14

Sappho and Erinna in a Garden at Mytilene (1864)

Simeon Solomon (1840-1905)歸為「拉斐爾前派」的代表畫家,作品多以希臘神話為內容,人物常顯現陰陽同體的氣質。事實上,他是一位同志,但很不幸地在1873年因為在公共廁所意圖與別的男子發生性行為,遭警察逮捕,被判刑入獄,反來改以罰鍰。這件事情讓他原本如日中天的事業,一下子跌入谷底。他的畫作主題未有直接的男同志主題,他倒是為了拉子姊妹以傳說中的女同傳奇人物莎孚創造出本幅作品。

上一篇Queer Women in classical art :13

2010/09/14

Crime d'amour

法國導演Alain Corneau的遺作《Crime d'amour》英文片名《Love Crime》,二位女主角Kristin Scott Thomas 與 Ludivine Sagnier 因為職場上的權力鬥爭,產生愛恨交織的張力.電影界一直很鍾情《All About Eve 彗星美人》類型的題材,為什麼女人之間的感情被描寫得這麼複雜?



Ludivine Sagnier(呂迪芬沙尼耶)是法國新生代女星,你可能看過或聽過她曾引進台灣的作品,如果還沒注意到,這回可以試著記起來。
2007 《Les chansons d'amour》(Love song,巴黎小情歌 2007)
2006 《Paris, je t'aime》(巴黎我愛你)
2003 《Petite Lili, La》(Little Lili, 遇見莉莉)
2003 《Swimming Pool》(池畔謀殺案) 導演Francois Ozon
2002 《8 femmes》(八美圖) 導演Francois Ozon
2000 《Water Drops on Burning Rocks》 (乾柴烈火) 導演Francois Ozon

2010/09/08

Whip it, roller derby

為什麼《Whip It 飆速青春》的明星宣傳照需要她們親吻來表現這般女性情誼?電影中並沒有女女情節,唯一出現的性愛場面仍然是異性戀當家。但我從三個地方感覺到整件事情隱藏的密碼:Roller derby(女子競速滑輪)的歷史、《飆速青春》的暗示影像,以及演員本身的傳聞(但我是倒著來看)。

美國在30年代經濟大蕭條時期發明這種衝撞運動,雖然充滿娛樂表演的意味,但是娛樂效果完全建立在結結實實的皮肉相撞.我感覺很像摔角:招式或許可以事先套好,但是流血和瘀青卻一點都假不了。這類激烈衝撞運動總讓我想起古羅馬競技場,或是西班牙的鬥牛場,只不過換了角色和你死我活的規則.

2010/08/28

All About Love


台式女女片暫告一段落,換換港式口味:《得閒炒飯》,導演許鞍華,演出:吳君如+周慧敏

2010/08/26

google-site-verification

google-site-verification: googleec83b276e318a058.html

2010/08/24

Julie's Fingersmith

Lang朗姊前幾天告訴我這幅插圖,出現在法國部落格Djou's Blog,取材自Fingersmith原著結尾:窗外天色昏暗,落雨不斷,倆人在火爐前,席地而坐,就著燭光,Maud用她令人魂牽夢引的聲音開始喃喃念起....當然畫者跳過了念稿,直接到了下一階段。( 注意:火爐上方是鏡子倒映窗外落雨)

我寫了email向畫者Julie M.自我介紹,並請她同意轉刊這幅圖。她很爽快地答應,但是對我寫這部改編影片有點意見:
I saw you wrote about the movie Fingersmith. Actresses are great but the adaptation...is so dreadful!

如果當初拍片找她當場景設計,說不定會更忠於原著?雖然我把圖借來放,但我建議你過去看看。因為原文下方有配樂。

另外,我建議可以看看她的其他作品,有些是描述拉子伴侶的生活。雖然語文不通,但是別有歐式風格。(右圖是順手牽過來的)

2010/08/18

First Trailer of Black Swan

Natalie Portman 娜塔莉波曼的新片預告終於登場,國外媒體的反應是Beautifully horrifying!

2010/08/13

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Supplement B

法國大革命的恐同迫害插曲

以前的教課書提到法國大革命的成因,不外乎是路易十六昏庸無能,皇后揮霍,國家財政不佳,強行徵稅引起民怨,最後導致暴動....我最近在看一本薄薄的小書《大革命之前的法國》,用較寬廣的史觀角度分析法國大革命的遠因。簡而言之,法國大革命的背景因素是老式國家機器的管理效能和方式趕不上經濟、社會、文化的演變。國王雖然難辭其咎,卻不是原因的總合。但王室畢竟是最明顯的箭靶,皇后(左圖)Marie Antoinette瑪莉安東尼(1755﹣1793)更成為最好攻擊的標的物。

皇后來自奧地利,為了兩國和平而決定的政治婚姻。然而法國人就是不喜歡奧地利,始終無法接納皇后。在革命初期,反對皇室人士有計劃地印製八卦傳單散播皇后的醜聞,除了文字還附上插圖。內容從她揮霍浪費,一直講到亂搞男女關係。尤以淫亂題材最具殺傷力,於是出現皇后男女通吃的流言。

皇后有兩位閨中密友,一位是Duchesse de Polignac 波利內公爵夫人,本名:Yolande Martine Gabrielle de Polastron(1749–1793).Polignac是法國貴族的姓氏,家族位於法國南部Polastron.

公爵夫人非常漂亮(見右圖),皇后在1775年初次見到她,驚為天人.其實路易十六也有意為年輕的皇后找些同伴,排遣她的孤獨.於是皇室執意要公爵夫人一家搬到凡爾賽宮附近,還為她們打理龐大的安置費用,幫她丈夫安排官位.

一般人認為公爵夫人是壞朋友,誘導皇后吃喝玩樂,因此八卦傳單最愛影射兩人有不可告人之事(如下面插圖,圖片來源,BTW,這是個有關瑪莉安東尼的法文討論版,可以挖到很多寶).但是越讀一些文章,越覺得這是當時有心人士抹黃的技倆.通常我樂於接受名人的女女傳聞,但就瑪莉安東尼的流言,我認為動機可議,手法不足可取。如果你想看一些辯駁,可以參考:Madame de Polignac and the Politics of Calumny


另一位被影射的人物是Princesse de Lamballe 朗巴爾王妃(左圖),本名:Maria Teresa Luisa of Savoy(1749﹣1792)。與公爵夫人差不多同時成為皇后的伴友。史料上記載朗巴爾王妃有才學,個性較為拘謹,但深受皇后喜愛,使她成為八卦傳單攻擊的人物。

王妃的遭遇令人不忍。她原有機會安全留在英國,卻選擇回到法國共赴國難。1792年人民審判,她拒絕放棄對皇室效忠,被丟入暴民之中任意處置。據說她被性侵後開腸剝肚,頭顱被切下。暴民舉著她的身首想拿給囚室中的皇后看。皇后過於痛心而暈厥。在一些歷史插畫,常可以找到以她受辱情況為題的圖畫(見下圖)。


如果你對瑪莉安東尼皇后想進一步了解,以下英文網站值得一讀:

瑪莉皇后的女女傳聞後來越發不可收拾,原本只是政敵一旁捕風捉影,最後竟出現一位女子隔海在英國出版回憶錄,大言不慚自己是皇后的同性情人.這就是知名醜聞"Affair of the Diamond Necklace 鑽石項鍊事件"

話說瑪莉皇后的公公:路易十五,為了討好情婦Madame du Barry,向珠寶商Boehmer訂製豪華鑽石項鍊.不幸,作品尚未完成,路易十五就去世了.珠寶商希望剛繼任王位的路易十六夫婦能買下鑽石項鍊,以解決先前投資製作項鍊造成的財務危機.但是這一大串鑽石項鍊實在過於昂貴,就算皇室也不敢下手.

Boehmer等了好幾次機會勸購.第二次時機是皇后生下第一胎,皇后不是不了解國家情勢,馬上拒絕:"At that price we have more need of a ship of the line than a necklace."(這時候是買戰艦而不是買項鍊的節骨眼)珠寶商不死心,皇后生下男嬰,再度上前遊說.皇后仍然拒絕,而且勸他把項鍊拆解零售.但是散鑽的價值比不上整條項鍊,Boehmer的危機便被Comtesse de la Motte 莫特瓦洛女伯爵所利用.

女伯爵本名:Jeanne de Valois, Jeanne de Saint-Rémy-de Luz(1756–1791),號稱有皇室血統,她父親據說是法王亨利二世的私生子.因為沒有名份,Jeanne小時候生活貧困,一心想要取得貴族地位.她應付男人的身段高超,藉由一個一個入幕之賓,慢慢往上層階級發展.

1783年,她遇上Louis René Édouard de Rohan (1734–1803),人稱Cardinal de Rohan羅昂樞機主教.雖然名為主教,卻沒什麼道德情操.Jeanne成為他的情婦,發現主教急欲討好皇后.其實主教曾經散播過皇后的壞話,當然對他沒有好感.

Jeanne靠著先生在禁衛軍工作之便,以及與宮內秘書Retaux de Villette的床上關係,開始羅織騙局.她告訴主教能代為牽線至皇后,兩人可以秘密通信.主教為什麼相信Jeanne如此神通廣大?據說她當時便聲稱自己是皇后的同性戀人.那個時代只有同志被別人指控,還沒人敢自行出櫃,更何況外面的八卦傳單謠言滿天飛,可憐的主教信以為真,根本未警覺皇后的來信全是偽造.這一幫人甚至找來一個女演員喬裝成皇后,安排與主教月下夜會,暗示主教偷偷出錢買下鑽石項鍊送給皇室,皇后再用其他方式回報.

於是主教找來珠寶商,將項鍊交由Jeanne轉呈皇后.沒多久,項鍊被犯罪集團拆解四處零售.他們的如意算盤是就算主教發現,他只能啞巴吃黃蓮,不敢說出.可是珠寶商沒拿到錢,直接告狀到宮庭,犯罪集團連同主教一干人等全部被囚禁.

路易十六夫婦嚥不下這口悶氣,堅持公開審判.很多歷史證明,司法公義與社會觀感之間存有差異,公關操作確實會影響大眾輿論.當時的路易十六不明白現代政治包裝的技巧,雖然司法還給皇室清白,但大部份的民眾卻相信皇后的貞操定有污點,否則無風不起浪.

Jeanne採用玉石俱焚的策略,緊咬是皇后的同性戀人.瑪莉安東尼陌名其妙的同志身份變成法國大革命人人喊殺的罪名.拿破崙後來便說道:
    "The Queen's death must be dated from the Diamond Necklace Trial" (皇后的死期從審判鑽石項鍊事件開始倒數.)
Jeanne入獄前判處鞭刑,還被烙印.但是反皇黨人士幫助她逃出監禁,變裝成男人,坐船逃到英國.她沒有銷聲匿跡,反而出版回憶錄Mémoires justificatifs de la comtesse de Valois de La Motte,出一本還不夠,1789年接著出了第二本.這二本回憶錄為法國大革命搧風點火,皇后與Jeanne的同性戀情更是有理說不清.
    Amazon可以買到法文版 Volume 1, Volume 2,另外在Google Book亦可看得到.
這個女人樹大招風.1791年她從住家三樓墬落,傷重不治.死因成疑,變成懸案.皇后比她多撐了兩年,最後死在斷頭台上.

Affair of the Diamond Necklace 於2001年被好萊塢改編成同名電影,中譯片名為《亂世美女》由Hilary Swank 希拉蕊史旺主演,你可以比較電影的角度.


瑪莉安東尼是否有女女傾向?深宮向來寂寞,難免有幾次實驗,但要講「傾向」,似乎她的女女光譜不及於此.

在《凡爾賽拜金女》雖然不觸及女女傳聞,她和二位女伴確實常在一起,不論在Petit Trianon(小翠安儂宮/小提亞儂宮)裝扮成牧羊女,還是跑到化裝舞會尋歡作樂.我們在電影中沒有特別感覺,但有網友精心剪輯,原來她們就是一群惡女幫啊!

2010/08/08

Anna Madeley in Earthquakes in London

瑪姐姐最近忙著演舞台劇Earthquakes in London,我找到她在劇中的劇照.老實說,完全看不出來那就是她,看起來是個很奇怪的角色:



如果你想進一步了解,可參考Earthquakes in London英文官網

2010/08/05

Proposition 8 overturned by judge

或許美國加州的家務事與我們沒有關係,但就同性婚姻公眾議題,8號公投法案的正反攻防真是高潮不斷.我們以為同志陣營輸掉數人頭比賽(同志還是少數族群啊),沒想到再上訴,法院認為不准同性婚姻是違反美國憲法.但是別高興,還要送高等法院裁決.

這裡有一則最新出爐的中文新聞稿:

法官撤銷加州同性戀婚姻禁令 反對者將提上訴

時間:2010/8/5 08:12 (新聞引據:採訪、路透社)

美國聯邦地方法院首席法官華克(Vaughn Walker)4日裁定,加州禁止同性戀婚姻的8號提案(Proposition 8)違憲,理由是,諸多證據顯示,這項提案違反了美國憲法的平等保護權(equal-protection rights)與正當法律程序(due process);但是,在此案送交更高一級法院裁決前,8號提案仍然有效。

這是倡議同性戀者享有結婚權利人士的勝利,不過,支持與反對8號提案的兩派陣營事前都曾經揚言,無論聯邦地方法官如何裁決,他們都會提起上訴;因此,此案幾乎篤定將會被提交給最高法院審理。

同性戀者之間的婚姻究竟是否應該合法化,同性戀權益倡議人士與民權人士主張平等權,認為應該給予承認;然而,包括許多宗教保守人士在內的反對者認為,同性戀婚姻對傳統家庭構成威脅。

這項爭議引發加州社會激烈辯論,支持傳統婚姻的人士向州政府申請,將「婚姻是由一男一女組成」的條文納入加州憲法,並交付選民公投決定,「8號提案」由此而生;這項提案於2008年11月公投中獲得通過。此事激起民權與同性戀者團體的強烈反彈,支持與反對的雙方為此展開法律大戰。

加州州長阿諾史瓦辛格曾經表示,他個人支持同性戀婚姻,但他也遵從選民的意願與法院裁決。對於最新的法庭裁定,阿諾認為,這項決定確認了每個人所應獲得的充分保障。

目前,美國50個州中,有39個州明文禁止同性戀婚姻,其中30州還將它納入憲法;愛荷華州、康乃狄克州、新罕布什爾州、佛蒙特州、麻塞諸塞州以及哥倫比亞特區則是承認同性戀婚姻合法。

2010/08/04

Anne Lister Index


文章索引 (最近更新:2010/9/19)

Beyond The Drama of Anne Lister 系列
Part 1:二百年前日記的發掘與解密過程
Part 2:Lister Family,與二位舊情人-Eliza Raine, Isabella Norcliffe(Tip)
Part 3:Belcombe Family,Marianna出嫁
Part 4:1821~1822,Marianna婚後與Anne的戀情
Part 5:1824~1825,巴黎生活前情概要
Part 6:巴黎戀情的四位候選人-Mrs Barlow, Miss Pope, Mlle de Sans, Miss Mackenzie
Part 7:The Game for Two 與巴夫人的雙人遊戲
Part 8:Behind The Door 門後春光


Supplement A:從《明天是舞會 : 十九世紀法國女性的時尚生活 》看十九世紀中上階層的婚姻與經濟
Supplement B:法國大革命的恐同迫害插曲-瑪莉皇后的女女傳聞
Supplement C:瑪莉皇后姊姊的女女傳聞

播映前追蹤報導:
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister Trailer:2010/5/25
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister DVD pre-order:2010/5/6
The First Hand News: The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister premiere:2010/3/19
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister will premiere on 17 March:2010/2/10
The Secret Diaries Of Miss Anne Lister:2009/11/12

2010/08/02

Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 7

The Game for Two

要說Anne Lister是個花心的人,有時不太公允.她知道貿然下手的風險,大部份時間僅止於耍嘴皮子,一付「色大膽小怕狗咬」,全等對方主動.她採取故作清純的策略,以靜制動.

巴夫人雖然結過婚,而且男伴不少,但女女潛力遠比我們想像的深厚.善用別人的同志傳聞,或是同志典故來試探,讓Anne暗自竊喜.巴夫人步步放寬親密界線,在小地方讓Anne吃儘甜頭,她認為破冰時刻,指日可待.

巴夫人的動機,除了感情因素,還有經濟的考量.而Anne對巴夫人的態度,卻非考量長期關係,而是貪圖短暫激情.我對Anne不太能諒解之處,她內心常常認為巴夫人別有企圖,但自己又心口不一致,給對方錯誤的期待.我比較古板,認為這樣為人有失厚道.

1824/10/14,巴夫人用法國皇后Marie Antoinette(瑪莉安東尼)的女女傳聞來測試Anne的態度:
    Somehow she began talking of that one of the things of which Marie Antoinette was accused of was being too fond of women. I, with perfect mastery of countenance, said I had never heard of it before and could not understand or believe it. . . . I said I would not believe such a thing existed. (Anne面不改色,說是從沒聽過這等事.請注意,她並非指沒聽過瑪莉皇后的女女情,而是指從沒聽過西方曾有同志存在.....這也裝得太過火了!)

我不記得Sofia Coppola(蘇菲亞柯波拉)的作品《凡爾賽拜金女》曾有這段情節,還找出DVD重新再看一次.柯波拉小姐的青春搖滾詮釋招來白眼,不過她壓根沒想去招惹瑪莉皇后雙性戀的爭議.

當時有本未授權回憶錄用諷刺的方式提到她的女女偏好,有興趣者可詳見:Rictor Norton (Ed.), Memoirs of Antonina [Marie Antoinette] 1791", Homosexuality in Eighteenth-Century England: A Sourcebook, 24 July 2002.

我對這本書略有保留.畢竟法國大革命的氛圍對瑪莉皇后極不友善.女女偏好可能是抹黑她的手段之一.就算她真是雙性戀,她的情慾私領域亦會跟著她的歷史評價一起陪葬.

    Mrs Barlow said it was mentioned in scripture, not in the New Testament not Deuteronomy, nor Leviticus. I said I believe that when reduced to the last extremity — I was going to mention the use of phalli but luckily Mrs Barlow said, 'You mean two men being fond of each other?' & I said 'Yes' . . .(巴夫人馬上拆穿,聖經裡早有提及同志,她怎麼會不知道.Anne正準備辯解,剛好巴夫人接話,那是指男人喜歡男人....)
    I declared I was the most innocent person in the world concerning all I had seen & heard, for everybody told me things. She said she should not have mentioned it but she knew she was not telling me anything I did not know before. I said I read of women being too fond of each other in the Latin parts of the works of Sir William Jones. . . . (Anne故作清純,這些不正經的事都是別處聽來、看來的.巴夫人才不理會她的清純無知說.Anne只好提到,在威廉瓊斯的作品中看到一些女女情事.)
    In fact, she suspected me and she was fishing to find it out but I think I was too deep for her. . . . She is a deepish hand & I think, would not be sorry to gain me over, but I shall be on my guard..(Anne懷疑巴夫人故意套問她,慶幸自己城府夠深.她開始產生被迫害妄想症,警覺不要陷入巴夫人的圈套.)
Anne對巴夫人又怕又愛,喊了幾百遍要小心,還不是自投羅網.反正Anne就喜歡和巴夫人聊天.次日,巴夫人繼續出擊,連女同小說都出現了.
    10/15:She then shewed me the little book the gentleman had left here for her, 'Voyage a Plombieres', P.126, where is the story of one woman intriging with another. She has lent me the book....(巴夫人拿出一本別的男客送給她的小說,其中便有描述到一段女同故事.我很好奇,那本書有沒有收錄到Fingersmith李老先生的索引裡.)
Anne不斷強調自已注重純友誼,同時很技巧地拋出一段話恭維巴夫人:
    [I] said I was half in love with Mlle de Sans but if I had appointed to go with her & was with Mrs Barlow, I could not keep the appointment. But if sitting with Mlle de Sans I could leave her to go to Mrs Barlow. Mrs Barlow has more tact, more power over me.....(她對珊小姐的情份只有五成,如果與珊小姐有約,卻在巴夫人身旁,她可不想離開;如果與巴夫人有約,卻在珊小姐身旁,她會抽身赴約.因為巴夫人對她的影響力更大.....嘴巴真甜啊!)
    I joked & said if I was my father's son I shold be sure I was in love with her - should know what was the matter with me. She said I was crazy, at the same time looking as if she wished to mead me on. [I] laughed & said I was not a accustomed to this sort of thing - should take pills or salts, etc.(Anne繼續天花亂墬,如果她是男兒身,一定會拜倒在巴夫人裙下.巴夫人樂得回灌迷湯.Anne故意承受不起,說要嗅鹽還是吞藥來提神醒腦.Anne真是交際高手,兩人的對話好像在MSN的打情罵俏.)
但同時間,她的理智又不斷提醒自己,巴夫人越靠越近了,懷疑她是何居心?
    .....She sat next me in the evening & every now  & then I felt her near me, touching me. My knees, my toes or something.....(晚上相談,巴夫人常常貼近而坐,碰碰Anne的膝蓋,摸摸她的腳趾....天曉得還有那個部位?)
    I really must be on my guard. What can she mean? Is she really amoureuse? This from a widow & mother like her is more than I could have thought of. I am safer with Mlle de Sans.....I keep telling her she is too deep, too knowing, for me.....She had said before, this house was a little world & I should think so if I had seen all she had. I begin to think so already.(Anne認為要小心.誰知道巴夫人的真正企圖?巴夫人可以成為情人嗎?Anne從沒考慮過寡婦而且是一個孩子的媽.和珊小姐在一起比較安全吧.Anne一直告訴巴夫人,她的境界太高了,高攀不起.而且巴夫人提過,這個旅館人多嘴雜,Anne應該多打探對方底細.)
巴夫人出招,Anne怯懦不應:
    10/17:She put her arm round me. I might have kissed her but contented myself with shaking hands.(巴夫人圍抱她,Anne心想親回去,卻雙手發抖不敢動.)
終於有了第一個吻,只是過程有點辛苦:
    10/19:Lord bless me, 'tis plain enough she would not allow me to go on in this manner, nor would she put herself so in my way if she did not like it. Just before her going, I put my arm round her waist & tried to pull her on my knee, she resisted & I gave up & apologized. I asked if she was angry as she went out. She said, 'No', & was giving me her lips to kiss when she recollected & suddenly turned her cheek, which I kissed, saying ' Why did you not do as you were going to do?' I had told her before I wished she could stay all night with me & if she wre at Shibden she could, to which she made no objection.....(其實巴夫人已鋪好紅地毯,只是Anne一直猶豫如何走上去.終於,Anne在巴夫人準備離去的關鍵時刻,她伸手環抱對方的腰想拉來坐在膝上.我覺得這個招式有點突兀,巴夫人第一個反應並沒有順從.Anne只好道歉問對方有沒有生氣.巴夫人大概是認為笨拙吧.換成由她作勢要吻,卻突然半途轉面,Anne則趁機親上她的臉頰.Anne問她,妳怎麼不做完要吻我的動作呢?她曾對巴夫人提到,如果妳在我的老家,我會要求妳整晚和我在一起.在一起做什麼?之前Anne提起過夜,可能是指促膝長談.後來不斷提起過夜,就沒那麼簡單.)
    10/20: ....She observed my wedding ring. [I] said this ought to bind me but this was pure friendship & I began to dread the influence that was greater.(巴夫人注意到Anne手上的訂情戒子,Anne推說那是純友誼--鬼才相信.她開始擔心這會壞了好事.不過,事後Anne會發現那是離開巴夫人的好藉口.)
    I perpetually plead my want of vanity to persuade myself it is possible for her to care for me. She little knows who she has to deal with. Before all this, I had laughed & joked & declared I would go to Italy and try the experiment, that is, get a woman there. She knew what I meant -(Anne不斷以滿足自我虛榮來,說服自己,深信巴夫人會愛上她.因為巴夫人根本不知交手的是何許人物.她對巴夫人開玩笑,會去義大利好好實驗.「實驗」的意思是去找個女人.我不懂為什麼是義大利,好像所有「敗德」情慾都發生在義大利.)
她們開始有過火的小動作,而且巴夫人最愛在情敵珊小姐的跟前偷偷進行:


    10/21While with Mlle de Sans, she (Mrs Barlow) let me have my hand up her petticoats almost to her knee. At last, she whispered, 'Do not yet.' She afterwards let me do it nearly as high. She had before taken away her legs once or twice but always put them back again. (晚餐時,Anne坐在巴夫人和珊小姐之間.巴夫人讓她的手伸進襯裙內摸到膝蓋.巴夫人一度低語制止她,但還是讓她起手.巴夫人有時承受不了,雙腿開展過一兩回,但最後還是回到淑女的坐姿.....哎呀,追求激情不是年輕人的特權,新戀情永遠讓人回復青春.)
正以為她們漸入佳境,兩人突然煞車,覺得發展太快:
    10/22:Said I felt quite ashamed of myself. Was determined to get the better of the thing & insinuated it would be Mrs Barlow's fault if I behaved foolishly again....Was not accustomed to this sort of folly. (Anne說自己少不更事,把責任推到巴夫人,都是她引誘小女子啦.)
巴夫人改採以進為退的策略,她也希望關係正常化,能有個正當名份:
    10/25:At last she said she was low. I asked why. She seemed ready to cry & said she thought she, too, was a little crazy....At last she said, 'If I adored you I would not live with you in this way. I would rather marry you.'....She said she could not bear to lose her own esteem & I should not love long what I did not respect. (巴夫人開始憂心忡忡,擔心這種激情不能常久,不被珍惜,於是提議結婚.哇,那時候的婚姻觀挺先進的.)
巴夫人認為同性婚姻可行,當時反而是Anne推三阻四,完全不像最後與Ann Walker結婚的氣勢.:
    I owned this. 'But,' said I, 'if I could propose your settling at Shibden &, of course, made you understand on what terms?' 'Oh,' said she, 'I must be respected by the world.' 'So you would,' said I. 'Well but,' said she, 'what would your friends [think]?' 'Oh,' said I, 'only that you were a new friend. I could easily manage this.' 'Ah,' 'said she, 'that I would not like. It would have been better had you been brought up as your father's son.' I said, 'No, you mistake me. It would not have done at all. I could not have married & should have been shut out from ladies' society. I could not have been with you as I am.' 'But,' said she, 'you would have taken your chance with the rest.' She meant of gentlemen. (Anne很好奇巴夫人對於被帶進門的意義為何?噢,她會感到被尊重.可是巴夫人反問妳的親友會怎麼想?Anne馬上變膽小,只敢佯裝是普通朋友,容易矇混過去.巴夫人不太滿意,妳得像個男人扛起來啊.Anne趕快解釋,妳高估我了,這完全辦不到.我不可能和妳結婚,我會被逐出仕女圈.以現在的我,不可能和妳長相廝守.巴夫人這下沒有安全牌,指著Anne:妳將來可能會找個男人嫁了.)
那一天,巴夫人幾乎要以眼淚收場,Anne被迫離去.次日當兩人走在杜樂莉公園,她提到第一眼看到Anne,以為是位男士:
    10/26:She said I astonished Mme Galvani at first, who once or twice said to the Mackenzies she thought I was a man & the Macks too had wondered. Mrs Barlow herself had thought at first wished to imitate the manners of a gentleman but now she knows me better, it was not put on. (Anne剛到旅館,至少有兩位房客誤以為她是男士.巴夫人誤會Anne是在模仿男士的舉止,後來進一步認識,才放棄那種想法.按照現代的說法,這就是T的特質.)
      She said she was low. She longed to have a home. [I] reminded her she might marry when she likes. She said she might if she had not shut herself up so many years. She likes attention & had not much from the men tonight. After waiting a while she said nobody had given her a word. Of course I gave her one directly. She would not suit me. I would tire of her - but flirting with her amuses me now.(晚上,巴夫人情緒低落,她坦言想要擁有家庭.Anne回嘴,只要妳想要就去找個歸宿.巴夫人則說自己封閉已久,引不起別人的注意.於是Anne就陪她打情罵俏.但Anne的內心再度出現可怕的獨白:她根本不適合我.有天我會厭倦她,但是現在和她調情讓我有點樂子.....唉,這不太厚道.)
    這個旅館的確人多嘴雜,沒多久Anne聽到有關巴夫人的流言:
      10/29: ....M. de Bellevue whispered to her the other night, 'Saint Enis touch', according to the sound, meaning sly, a saint in public but not in private.....'Well,' said I to myself, 'what hands have I got into? How to get out again? let this be a lesson for the future.'(哇,人前是聖女,人後是蕩婦!嚇得Anne緊張,為什麼招惹到這號人物?怎麼脫身?如何反範未然?)
    Anne後來遇到巴夫人,用了一個很啼笑皆非的例子,間接說明她不會娶巴夫人--因為Anne也很喜歡珊小姐,但就是不會娶對方:
      Should have been in love with her(珊小姐) if I had been a man, but would not have married her. Would only have married an Englishwoman. Would not mix the blood......I was proud of my country.(如果我是男人,我會愛上珊小姐,但我不會娶她,只會娶英國女人.我不會混淆血統....我很熱愛祖國.天呀,Anne是被嚇壞腦筋嗎,這是什麼爛理由?)
      What would Marianna say to all this if she knew? I am indeed unable, it seems, to take care of myself with women. I am always getting into some scrape with them. If Mrs Barlow did not like me she would not let me talk & do as I do. But no more, I shall be in the mire if I don't take care. (Anne突然想念起Marianna,難怪會被對方看扁.Anne承認不會應付女人,老是陷入麻煩.但她也認為巴夫人是喜歡她,才會讓她為所欲為.最後又提醒自己千萬要小心.)
    其實,喊再多小心都沒有用:
      11/3:In wishing her goodnight she quietly let me put my arms around her waist & gently press her & very gently kiss her. She stood, too, with her right thigh a little within my left, in contact - which she has never permitted before. She likes me certainly.(道別的時候,牽牽小手,親親一吻...都不算什麼.巴夫人同意她越線近身:兩人雙腿互相交錯貼近....)
      11/4:[Mrs Barlow] often looks at my gold rings & just presses them on my finger. She had done so tonight. Said I, 'I know you often think of those rings. Perhaps you attach too much importance to them & i too little.' She asked if I had described the friend who gave them. I somehow said, 'No.' 'Ah,' said she, 'she is your dearest friend. You told me it was Mrs Lawton. You told me wrong then.' To this I mad no answer....(巴夫人覺得Anne的戒子很礙眼,直追問贈送者的來歷.Anne本想閃躲,卻被猜中就是Marianna.)
      What Would Marianna say? She has not written to me of too long.(典型地找舊愛討論新歡.Anne納悶老情人為何都沒來信,趕快寫信來,可有個人商量!)
    她們又討論起是否適合結婚,巴夫人自謙條件不好,配不上Anne.可是Anne用了另一種邏輯,既能安撫巴夫人,又能免於自己被逼婚.
      11/5:....'But there are two, & only two, things. You have been married - you must make comparisons. it is impossible you should love me well enough. And there is the thought of those rings, which does come across my conscience. But you could not love me well enough. You must make comparisons.' She merely answered, 'You do not know me.'.....I said the best thing for me would be her marrying.(我們不適合結婚的原因有兩點:妳結過婚,會比較,不可能愛我多過前夫;妳比我還會惦記我的戒子,妳一定會計較,不可能多愛我一點.巴夫人雖然想反駁,Anne一句話想打死結婚的念頭:妳嫁個好人家,對妳我都好.)
    Anne要巴夫人再嫁,不表示她就了無慾望,而是手照摸,臉照親:
      11/7: Kissed her in a little dark passage as we came out of the dining room. She let me kiss her now very quietly & sits with her feet close to mine....If I had a penis, tho' of but small length, I should surely break the ice some of these times, before I go.(兩人常常把握機會搞小動作,例如經過一段光線不亮的穿廊就偷親一下.兩人靠近坐著,腳就偷偷挨著.Anne暗自得意,她要是有個陽具,在離開巴黎之前,一定能破冰而出.好個登徒子的心聲?)
    和珊小姐等人一同去看戲,Anne和巴夫人一找到機會就摸摸茶:
      11/9:Under our shawls, had my arm round her waist great part of the time.(在影集一開場,Anne與披著長巾的Marianna在林中牽手.在巴黎,趁著披巾掩飾之便,Anne一路挽著巴夫人的柳腰而行.)
      11/10I asked if she would burn my letters [if they corresponded at a later date]. She said she would do whatever I asked her. I thanked her, saying I would then write more at ease, assured that she would destroy all that it might be imprudent to keep.(Anne沒有教導巴夫人學會暗號,於是她要求巴夫人如果未來雙方通信,請把她的信件燒掉,免得擔心有後遺症,無法暢所欲言.唉,其實Anne對巴夫人從頭到尾就不想有「後遺症」.)
      Speaking of her good figure & pretty hand and of her foot, asked her to let me span her ancle. She refused. I said I was contented she should refuse me this now but could not bear it if we were always together. 'Oh,' said she, 'then it would be a different thing.' She now stands nearer to me when I kiss her, yet she always withdraws the moment it becomes that I am excited. She certainly know how to gain one's affections. (Anne正在讚賞巴夫人的好身材,突然要求握握對方的足踝.人家當然拒絕.Anne大言不慚,現在被拒沒關係,如果未來在一起,會令人受不了.巴夫人回答,到那時候當然就不一樣.在這個階段,她還能夠欲擒故縱:Anne親吻她時,靠近一點,但當Anne開始興奮便抽身而去.Anne知道這種撩撥的遊戲.等到Anne的慾望越來越強烈,巴夫人根本無從拒絕,只能一起捲入慾火.)

    2010/07/27

    Vows video of New York Times

    最近工作量較重,還沒時間寫完Anne Lister。有人怕我沈默太久,故意丟一則New York Times的視訊新聞過來。我東找西找,竟然看到結婚專題。挑了兩則很有意義的影片。不蓋你,我一邊看一邊掉眼淚.....


    2010/07/21

    While she was 17

    1980年,她才17歲,既像女孩又像小女人.當Jodie Foster最新作品《The Beaver》被Mel Gibson暴力梅伯的負面新聞搞得無法發行,這段遙遠的歷史插曲讓人突然抽離現在,回到她光明在望的某個時間點."The Kid Goes To College",當年由Andy Warhol訪問茱蒂,並由Bob Kiss掌鏡留下的倩影。她正在等待哈佛和耶魯的錄取通知。事後我們知道她選擇後者,主修文學,而不是表演。她喜歡閱讀和寫作,這在演藝圈並不常見。


    2010/07/15

    Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 6

    Mrs Barlow, Miss Pope, Mlle de Sans, Miss Mackenzie

    1824/9/2,Anne下榻Place Vendôme第一天與各房客打過一輪照面,最先被寫入日記的就是Mrs Barlow巴夫人.倒不是對巴夫人印象深刻,而是Anne的僕人Cordingley和巴夫人英法雙語的僕人先有往來,而對女主人間接有了印象.次日Anne便找上巴夫人請教添購衣裝的意見.(*看過Supplement A,一定記得當時巴黎中上階級很注重打扮)

    (右圖為英國Regency時期[1811-1820]女性騎馬服飾)

    接下來幾天,常常看見Anne到巴夫人房間坐坐,或是巴夫人過來聊聊,好像倆人之間玩著欲擒故縱的遊戲.到了9/20,雙方禮尚往來多日後,巴夫人率先試探:
      ~ In the evening sat above an hour with Mrs Barlow - Her eyes sparkled when she saw me & she was evidently afraid lest anyone else was coming. She surely wished to have a tête-à-tête (私下深談). She rather flatters me on my talents & agreeableness & I gently flatter her on being ladylike & pretty. (巴夫人看到Anne,眼中閃爍著光芒,這個反應就對了.她想要好好聊一聊,這次交談交換許多重要資訊.一開始,巴夫人稱許她聰明,Anne讚美對方漂亮,好像傳統的男女調情.)
      She asked me if I had any male correspondents. I said one, between seventy & eighty, mentioning Mr Duffin, & said I was no believer in platonic attachments. Preferred ladies' company to gentlemen's. Did many things ladies in general could not do but did them quietly. My education had been different from the common rule. I was suited to my circumstances.(巴夫人開始試探Anne有沒有男朋友?Anne火力全開,不相信柏拉圖關係,但直言女人作伴強過男人.認為自己所受教育不同於一般女子,對自己的特殊情況甘之如飴.)
      On my uncle's death should come in for my uncle's estate at my own disposal. He had no high opinion of ladies, was not fond of leaving estates to females. Were I other than I am, would not leave his to me. (Anne很技巧地提到自己的身家.舅舅輕視女流之輩,本不考慮指定女繼承人.但是Anne才情出眾,才能全權管理租產. )
      Mrs B[arlow] said she knew all this before. Mrs Middleton had told her. Mrs B[arlow] wanted some confidence from me but I said nothing she might not repeat. (其實巴夫人早就打聽清楚Anne的來歷,只是想從她口中驗證.多有心機啊!)

    2010/07/13

    Days of Grace

    Days of Grace的中譯本《我的愛,說不出口》上個星期出現在新書區.我沒有特別注意過這本書.書名引起我的好奇.翻看到封面上的故事大要,看到其中一段書評,我知道自己的直覺獲得應證:
      猶如作家莎拉.沃特斯(Sarah Waters)和《蝴蝶夢》作者戴芙妮.杜茉莉二人的結合之作。這本書做到了每一部優秀的處女作該做到的一切:令你感動、令你驚訝,並且恢復了你對小說具有能將你帶往另一個世界之力量的信心……霍爾對於單戀的那種細膩痛苦描述得十分優美。」——《哈波時尚》
      (為了確定這段書評的意思,我找來原文對照)Sarah Waters meets Daphine du Maurier. Days of Grace does everything a good debut should: moves you, surprises you and restores your faith in the power of a novel. Hall writes beautifully about the exquisite pains of unrequited love." Harper's Bazaar (UK)
    在出版社含蓄的宣傳策略下,Sarah Waters 變成一個標籤,默默地向我們傳遞訊息,不驚擾到一般讀者.雖然故事全書287頁,主人翁Nora Lynch(諾拉)對Grace Rivers(葛蕾絲)的愛慾在第92頁即開始愈益顯露.諾拉的感情是故事的壓力來源,卻不是故事的最終秘密.最大秘密是另一個用來對照的禁忌之愛.這樣的佈局為讀者帶來驚喜,但不知是否譯文的隔閡,我覺得略顯匠氣,劇本的痕跡壓過小說的文學性.

    2010/07/08

    11th Anniversary

    2010/7/8-9:十一週年慶阿里山之旅

    設備:Sony DV (4:3)
    剪輯:iMovie@MacBookPro (2011/11/3)
    音樂:阿帕拉契之旅(Appalachian Journey)/艾蜜莉的舞曲(Emily's Reel) by Yo-Yo Ma, Edgar Meyer, Mark O'Connor


    2010/07/07

    Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Part 5

    我們要來檢視Anne Lister一段不太負責任的情史.故事要從巴黎開始.....

    Anne Lister造訪巴黎數次,第一次在1822年9/5~9/28,和父親及妹妹同行.那一次旅行令她大開眼界,不過她受不了家人沒見過世面的土樣子,恥於與他們為伍.她在9/9的日記中感歎:
      "Marian(妹妹), poor girl, is no society for me & I am thoroughly ashamed of my father's vulgarity. I do indeed wish I was out of the scrape & at home. Yet never despair. I will make the best of it & improve myself as much as I can."
    這種矛盾心理刺激她往上層階級發展的決心.在後續的日記,可以看到她時而工於心計,時而鄙視諷刺的內心面.但是,一碰到色字當頭,她就會暫時忘了努力目標.

    Anne為什麼要遠赴巴黎?1823年,Mariana嫌棄她越來越中性的外表,傷透了Anne的心,不過她們並沒有停止往來,只是讓Anne開始思索別的人生規劃.1824年7月初,她已規劃好巴黎之行,對外的理由是學習法文,充實國際經驗,期望歐陸的人脈對未來的事業有助益.私底下,她是想降低Mariana對她的影響力,而且想要找尋名醫解決性病的困擾.

    2010/07/05

    Beyond the drama of Anne Lister:Supplement A

    Anne Lister在法國的日記引發我研究相關主題的熱忱,我想把幾本有趣的書籍逐一簡介,有些內容雖然與女同無關,但描繪出當時的人文風俗,有助於了解Anne Lister身處的環境,對華老師維多利亞三部曲中的情境亦有更深一層的認識.

    《明天是舞會 : 十九世紀法國女性的時尚生活 》是二年前買的書,一直沒機會全部看完.上週日我幫Fruit的媽媽整理房間(之前是我們的書房),看到它如獲至寶.顧不得搬完12個箱子之後滿身大汗,我打開書,沈浸到文字的世界裡,水果媽坐在旁邊安靜地打起瞌睡.... 

    作者鹿島茂,是旅法日本文學作家,專攻19世紀法國的社會與文化.我後來查到國內法文系或法國研究的教授將他的著作列入研究書單.事實上他的文字淺顯易懂,適合所有人閱讀.

    以十九世紀為背景的影視作品,主角常面對愛情與婚姻無法兩全的困局.我輕淺地推說那只是舊社會的思維,卻從不了解養成那套思維的社會結構是如何細膩沈重,能夠宰制當時所有人的思想.

    一開始我看Anne Lister的巴黎日記,她老是提到每個人的年收入,或是用家世背景來看待與新情人之間的關係.用現代人的眼光來看,她真是自私自利.然而自私自利不是只有她一個人而已,而是整個資產階級都是相同的想法.

    2010/07/02

    Some arrangements

    最近發生一些事情,好事、壞事,和不知是好是壞的事,統統都有.可能會對版上的步調產生一些影響.

    Fruit和我要慶祝11週年了!因為家裡老人家身體不適,我們不敢走太遠,下星期決定要上阿里山賞日出.相信嗎,Fruit從沒看過阿里山日出,真不知她是怎麼渡過這些年?所以這次一定要打破紀錄.

    我記得大學畢業環島旅行其中一站是奮起湖,當地旅館的小女兒帶我們一群人爬18羅漢洞.她大概不清楚這些肉雞的體力,行程從午餐後出發,一路翻山越嶺,走到太陽下山四周一片漆黑都還沒回到旅館.後面的女生一邊走一邊哭,我是前面領先群中少數的女生.後來旅館老闆開車來找我們,他把後面的女生先載回去.我看著車燈從眼前消失而去,心中百感交集.

    另外,Fruit最近和學生打球受傷,小指骨折,醫生診斷至少要固定一個月,整隻手包得像招財貓一樣.她姊姊第一次看到慘況,很自然地指著我一定要幫Fruit洗澡.我們倆人一陣尷尬沒有作聲.

    上次我擔任看護幫她洗澡,是因她結石開刀住院.我還負責煮稀飯餵她吃.照顧病人,我的經驗很豐富,我母親因外科手術住院多次,關於家屬在醫院陪伴的情況我並不陌生.

    老實說,以前在我們的小窩,乾濕分離的浴室設備較好,真的很方便倆人一起洗澡,可以一邊聊天一邊幫對方刷背.我們還從日本買回不同的溫泉粉,冬天在家就把浴缸弄得白白綠綠,想像還在渡假中.我們還有毛巾料的白浴袍,穿起來像住在旅館.我會幫她吹頭髮,吹得像孫悟空一般往四面八方噴射.....她老家現在一切從簡,不太方便一起洗澡,而且我實在沒什麼心情.還好她的手傷影響不大,就幫她吹過一次頭髮而已.

    聽起來好像我有點不滿,但又莫可耐何.我們想法子另外找點樂子,多看場電影,多上點館子.

    我們公司又有一波組織調整.我已渡過了好幾次風潮,但這次有些令人莫明焦慮,因為連上面的大老闆都換了,組織的結構更是完全重整.這是商業體系常玩的把戲,當成長到達一定瓶頸,第一步就是把人當棋子重新排列組合.不曉得接下來對我會產生什麼影響?經過一年半前癌症的教訓,我會儘量提醒自己要輕鬆以待.

    說到教訓,有幾個養生習慣終於維持下來.週間早餐一定是現打蔬果汁,但裡頭會再加些藍藻、螺旋藻,其實看起來有點可怕.我大多搭配天然有機的麵包,要我早餐吃飯真的改不過來.

    每週都會上二個小時的瑜伽課.本來有好幾個同事一起報名,後來只剩下我一個人學了大半年.雙腿始終盤坐不起來,但是耐力改善不少,且不容易腰酸背痛.Fruit有一次很邪惡地讚美我:妳的柔軟度好棒啊.好吧,她也有享受到好處.

    最後是關於Anne Lister的系列文章.最終還是買回兩本日記集回來研究.我發現網路上的資料有點支離破碎,Anne-Mariana的部份將來需要再重整,但就Anne在巴黎的故事,我希望花一點時間一次到位.我大致看完1824-1825年的記載,佩服她追求女友的技術一流,永遠性致勃勃,只是有時太自私自利.還有,她的情色描述,看第一遍時真令人臉紅心跳,完全顛覆對同時期珍奧斯汀戲劇的人物印象.我很傷腦筋,不曉得該怎麼節錄原文......

    2010/06/28

    Alice in Wonderland

    《Alice in Wonderland》沒有絲毫女同情節,再加上電影整體成績很失敗,照理是不會在這裡大書特書.只是我最近在研究西洋服裝史的資料,特別注意片中的服裝設計.片尾是女主角穿上一身長禮服,裡頭搭上背心,再繫上銀色領結,登船準備拓展海外市場.....難不成,這是另一個雄才大略的Anne Lister嗎?

    如果原著是從身體上的改變來辯證自我存在,電影版則繼續自我認同的題目,但是多了一些女性自覺(或是性別角色質疑):不願意走入傳統婚姻的宿命,突然破格成為屠龍的女英雄,最後成為雄心壯志的企業家.光是從女主角的服裝改變,可以看清這條故事的脈絡.

    本片的服裝設計是Colleen Atwood,她的作品多和Tim Burton合作,很了解導演的奇幻風格.其實她可以執行華麗的舞台效果,如《Chicago》 (2002)、 《Nine 》(2009);也可以勝任食人魔低調的驚悚,如《Manhunter》 (1986)、《 The Silence of the Lambs 》(1991);當然,玩過Tim Burton的絢爛人物,對於同志影片更能駕輕就熟,如《Torch Song Trilogy 》(1988)、《 Philadelphia 》(1993).

    這些並不表示她沒有史實考據的能力,《Little Women》 (1994)、 《Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events 》(2004)是她的兩部古典作品.只是這畢竟不是BBC,片中的現代改良版服裝變成借今寓古的最佳道具.

    說是現代改良版,因為《愛麗絲夢遊仙境》於1865年出版,電影的服裝風格不論是放在19世紀前期還是後期,19歲的愛麗絲不可能留一頭放縱的長髮,一定得盤起來分份守己.19世紀末的女性雖然會打上領結,但是女性外套的剪裁採用蓬鬆的袖山高,而片尾窄袖直身的服裝風格是從男性大禮服借用過來.

    愛麗絲的鎧甲與聖女貞德的味道還是有點差異.畢竟那是屠龍的戰袍,多了點雄性陽剛.

    回到Mia Wasikowska身上.她的長相很特別,沒有傳統好萊塢明星的女性化,卻有著歐式雌雄同體的味道.她穿著盔甲時,猛一看,還以為是《魂斷威尼斯》少男的兄弟姊妹.

    不知道編劇Linda Woolverton的本意為何?她寫過《Beauty and the Beast》(1991),有女性自覺似乎是必然的.然而Mia Wasikowska的那張臉,還有她身上的鎧甲與長禮服,讓我老往片中的性別曖昧胡思亂想.